Files
kfitz-site/reverb10-day-14-appreciate/index.html
Kathleen Fitzpatrick 4277f0cd61 rebuild 11ty 3.1.0
2025-05-13 11:56:49 -04:00

718 lines
17 KiB
HTML
Raw Blame History

This file contains ambiguous Unicode characters

This file contains Unicode characters that might be confused with other characters. If you think that this is intentional, you can safely ignore this warning. Use the Escape button to reveal them.

<!doctype html>
<html lang="en">
<head>
<meta charset="utf-8">
<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1.0">
<title>#reverb10, day 14: Appreciate</title>
<meta name="description" content="The long-running and erratically updated blog of Kathleen Fitzpatrick.">
<link rel="alternate" href="feed/feed.xml" type="application/atom+xml" title="kfitz">
<script async="" src="https://talk.hyvor.com/embed/embed.js" type="module"></script>
<link rel="webmention" href="https://webmention.io/kfitz.info/webmention">
<link rel="pingback" href="https://webmention.io/kfitz.info/xmlrpc">
<style>/**
* okaidia theme for JavaScript, CSS and HTML
* Loosely based on Monokai textmate theme by http://www.monokai.nl/
* @author ocodia
*/
code[class*="language-"],
pre[class*="language-"] {
color: #f8f8f2;
background: none;
text-shadow: 0 1px rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.3);
font-family: Consolas, Monaco, 'Andale Mono', 'Ubuntu Mono', monospace;
font-size: 1em;
text-align: left;
white-space: pre;
word-spacing: normal;
word-break: normal;
word-wrap: normal;
line-height: 1.5;
-moz-tab-size: 4;
-o-tab-size: 4;
tab-size: 4;
-webkit-hyphens: none;
-moz-hyphens: none;
-ms-hyphens: none;
hyphens: none;
}
/* Code blocks */
pre[class*="language-"] {
padding: 1em;
margin: .5em 0;
overflow: auto;
border-radius: 0.3em;
}
:not(pre) > code[class*="language-"],
pre[class*="language-"] {
background: #272822;
}
/* Inline code */
:not(pre) > code[class*="language-"] {
padding: .1em;
border-radius: .3em;
white-space: normal;
}
.token.comment,
.token.prolog,
.token.doctype,
.token.cdata {
color: #8292a2;
}
.token.punctuation {
color: #f8f8f2;
}
.token.namespace {
opacity: .7;
}
.token.property,
.token.tag,
.token.constant,
.token.symbol,
.token.deleted {
color: #f92672;
}
.token.boolean,
.token.number {
color: #ae81ff;
}
.token.selector,
.token.attr-name,
.token.string,
.token.char,
.token.builtin,
.token.inserted {
color: #a6e22e;
}
.token.operator,
.token.entity,
.token.url,
.language-css .token.string,
.style .token.string,
.token.variable {
color: #f8f8f2;
}
.token.atrule,
.token.attr-value,
.token.function,
.token.class-name {
color: #e6db74;
}
.token.keyword {
color: #66d9ef;
}
.token.regex,
.token.important {
color: #fd971f;
}
.token.important,
.token.bold {
font-weight: bold;
}
.token.italic {
font-style: italic;
}
.token.entity {
cursor: help;
}
/*
* New diff- syntax
*/
pre[class*="language-diff-"] {
--eleventy-code-padding: 1.25em;
padding-left: var(--eleventy-code-padding);
padding-right: var(--eleventy-code-padding);
}
.token.deleted {
background-color: hsl(0, 51%, 37%);
color: inherit;
}
.token.inserted {
background-color: hsl(126, 31%, 39%);
color: inherit;
}
/* Make the + and - characters unselectable for copy/paste */
.token.prefix.unchanged,
.token.prefix.inserted,
.token.prefix.deleted {
-webkit-user-select: none;
user-select: none;
display: inline-flex;
align-items: center;
justify-content: center;
padding-top: 2px;
padding-bottom: 2px;
}
.token.prefix.inserted,
.token.prefix.deleted {
width: var(--eleventy-code-padding);
background-color: rgba(0,0,0,.2);
}
/* Optional: full-width background color */
.token.inserted:not(.prefix),
.token.deleted:not(.prefix) {
display: block;
margin-left: calc(-1 * var(--eleventy-code-padding));
margin-right: calc(-1 * var(--eleventy-code-padding));
text-decoration: none; /* override del, ins, mark defaults */
color: inherit; /* override del, ins, mark defaults */
}
/* This is an arbitrary CSS string added to the bundle */
/* Defaults */
@font-face {
font-family: "Atkinson Hyperlegible";
src: url('/css/files/atkinson-hyperlegible-latin-400-normal.woff2') format('woff2');
font-display: swap;
}
@font-face {
font-family: "Atkinson Hyperlegible";
font-weight: bold;
src: url('/css/files/atkinson-hyperlegible-latin-700-normal.woff2') format('woff2');
font-display: swap;
}
@font-face {
font-family: "Atkinson Hyperlegible";
font-style: italic
src: url('/css/files/atkinson-hyperlegible-latin-400-italic.woff2') format('woff2');
font-display: swap;
}
:root {
--font-family: "Atkinson Hyperlegible", -apple-system, system-ui, sans-serif;
--font-family-monospace: Consolas, Menlo, Monaco, Andale Mono WT, Andale Mono, Lucida Console, Lucida Sans Typewriter, DejaVu Sans Mono, Bitstream Vera Sans Mono, Liberation Mono, Nimbus Mono L, Courier New, Courier, monospace;
font-size: 18px;
}
/* Theme colors */
:root {
--color-gray-20: #e0e0e0;
--color-gray-50: #C0C0C0;
--color-gray-90: #333;
--background-color: #fff;
--text-color: var(--color-gray-90);
--text-color-link: #d61d4a;
--text-color-link-active: #853439;
--text-color-link-visited: #e8325e;
--syntax-tab-size: 2;
}
@media (prefers-color-scheme: dark) {
:root {
--color-gray-20: #e0e0e0;
--color-gray-50: #C0C0C0;
--color-gray-90: #dad8d8;
/* --text-color is assigned to --color-gray-_ above */
--text-color-link: #1493fb;
--text-color-link-active: #6969f7;
--text-color-link-visited: #a6a6f8;
--background-color: #15202b;
}
}
/* Global stylesheet */
* {
box-sizing: border-box;
}
@view-transition {
navigation: auto;
}
html,
body {
padding: 0;
margin: 0 auto;
font-family: var(--font-family);
color: var(--text-color);
background-color: var(--background-color);
}
html {
overflow-y: scroll;
}
body {
max-width: 40em;
}
/* https://www.a11yproject.com/posts/how-to-hide-content/ */
.visually-hidden {
clip: rect(0 0 0 0);
clip-path: inset(50%);
height: 1px;
overflow: hidden;
position: absolute;
white-space: nowrap;
width: 1px;
}
p:last-child {
margin-bottom: 0;
}
p {
line-height: 1.5;
}
li {
line-height: 1.5;
}
a[href] {
color: var(--text-color-link);
}
a[href]:visited {
color: var(--text-color-link-visited);
}
a[href]:hover,
a[href]:active {
color: var(--text-color-link-active);
}
main,
footer {
padding: 1rem;
}
main :first-child {
margin-top: 0;
}
header {
border-bottom: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-20);
}
header:after {
content: "";
display: table;
clear: both;
}
footer {
border-top: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-50);
}
.links-nextprev {
display: flex;
justify-content: space-between;
gap: .5em 1em;
list-style: "";
border-top: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-20);
padding: 1em 0;
}
.links-nextprev > * {
flex-grow: 1;
}
.links-nextprev-next {
text-align: right;
}
table {
margin: 1em 0;
}
table td,
table th {
padding-right: 1em;
}
pre,
code {
font-family: var(--font-family-monospace);
}
pre:not([class*="language-"]) {
margin: .5em 0;
line-height: 1.375; /* 22px /16 */
-moz-tab-size: var(--syntax-tab-size);
-o-tab-size: var(--syntax-tab-size);
tab-size: var(--syntax-tab-size);
-webkit-hyphens: none;
-ms-hyphens: none;
hyphens: none;
direction: ltr;
text-align: left;
white-space: pre;
word-spacing: normal;
word-break: normal;
overflow-x: auto;
}
code {
word-break: break-all;
}
/* Header */
header {
display: flex;
gap: 1em .5em;
flex-wrap: wrap;
align-items: center;
padding: 1em;
}
.home-link {
font-size: 1.5em; /* 16px /16 */
font-weight: 700;
margin-right: 2em;
}
.home-link:link:not(:hover) {
text-decoration: none;
}
/* Nav */
.nav {
display: flex;
padding: 0;
margin: 0;
list-style: none;
}
.nav-item {
display: inline-block;
margin-right: 1em;
}
.nav-item a[href]:not(:hover) {
text-decoration: none;
}
.nav a[href][aria-current="page"] {
text-decoration: underline;
}
/* Posts list */
.postlist {
list-style: none;
padding: 0;
padding-left: 1.5rem;
}
.postlist-item {
display: flex;
flex-wrap: wrap;
align-items: baseline;
counter-increment: start-from -1;
margin-bottom: 1em;
}
.postlist-item:before {
display: inline-block;
pointer-events: none;
content: "" counter(start-from, decimal-leading-zero) ". ";
line-height: 100%;
text-align: right;
margin-left: -1.5rem;
}
.postlist-date,
.postlist-item:before {
font-size: 0.8125em; /* 13px /16 */
color: var(--color-gray-90);
}
.postlist-date {
word-spacing: -0.5px;
}
.postlist-link {
font-size: 1.1875em; /* 19px /16 */
font-weight: 700;
flex-basis: calc(100% - 1.5rem);
padding-left: .25em;
padding-right: .5em;
text-underline-position: from-font;
text-underline-offset: 0;
text-decoration-thickness: 1px;
}
.postlist-item-active .postlist-link {
font-weight: bold;
}
/* Archive list */
.archivelist {
padding: 0;
padding-left: 2.5rem;
}
.archivelist-item {
align-items: baseline;
margin-bottom: 1em;
}
.archivelist-item::marker {
text-align: right;
margin-left: -1.5rem;
font-size: 0.8125em; /* 13px /16 */
color: var(--color-gray-90);
}
.archivelist-date {
font-size: 0.8125em; /* 13px /16 */
color: var(--color-gray-90);
word-spacing: -0.5px;
}
.archivelist-link {
font-size: 1.1875em; /* 19px /16 */
font-weight: 700;
flex-basis: calc(100% - 1.5rem);
padding-left: .25em;
padding-right: .5em;
text-underline-position: from-font;
text-underline-offset: 0;
text-decoration-thickness: 1px;
}
.archivelist-item-active .archivelist-link {
font-weight: bold;
}
/* Tags */
.post-tag {
display: inline-flex;
align-items: center;
justify-content: center;
text-transform: capitalize;
font-style: italic;
}
.postlist-item > .post-tag {
align-self: center;
}
/* Tags list */
.post-metadata {
display: inline-flex;
flex-wrap: wrap;
gap: .5em;
list-style: none;
border-top: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-20);
border-bottom: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-20);
padding: 3px 0px 3px 0px;
margin: 0;
font-size: .8em;
}
.post-metadata time {
margin-right: 1em;
}
/* Direct Links / Markdown Headers */
.header-anchor {
text-decoration: none;
font-style: normal;
font-size: 1em;
margin-left: .1em;
}
a[href].header-anchor,
a[href].header-anchor:visited {
color: transparent;
}
a[href].header-anchor:focus,
a[href].header-anchor:hover {
text-decoration: underline;
}
a[href].header-anchor:focus,
:hover > a[href].header-anchor {
color: #aaa;
}
h2 + .header-anchor {
font-size: 1.5em;
font-weight: bold;
}
h1 {
font-weight: bolder;
}
summary {
font-size: 1.5em;
font-weight: bold;
margin-bottom: .5em;
}
img {
display: block;
margin-left: auto;
margin-right: auto;
}
blockquote {
display: block;
margin-left: 2em;
margin-right: 3em;
padding-left: 10px;
border-left: 10px solid var(--text-color-link);
}
hr.new {
border: none;
border-top: 1px dashed var(--color-gray-50);
}
/* Webmention Section */
.webmentions {
display:block;
text-align: left;
}
.webmentions__facepile {
display:flex;
align-items: center;
flex-wrap: wrap;
}
.webmentions__face {
width: 2rem;
height: 2rem;
border-radius: 50%;
object-fit: cover;
flex: none;
}
.webmentions__list {
list-style-type: none;
padding:0;
}
.webmentions__item {
margin-bottom: 2rem;
}
/* Single Webmention */
.webmention {
display:block;
}
.webmention__meta,
.webmention__author {
display: flex;
align-items: center;
flex-wrap: wrap;
}
.webmention__meta {
margin-bottom:.5rem;
}
.webmention__author {
margin-right:.25rem;
}
.webmention__author__photo {
height: 3rem;
width: 3rem;
border-radius: 50%;
object-fit: cover;
margin-right:.5rem;
}
.webmention__pubdate {
font-style: italic;
}
/* Message Box */
.message-box {
--color-message-box: #ffc;
display: block;
background-color: var(--color-message-box);
color: var(--color-gray-90);
padding: 1em 0.625em; /* 16px 10px /16 */
}
.message-box ol {
margin-top: 0;
}
@media (prefers-color-scheme: dark) {
.message-box {
--color-message-box: #082840;
}
}</style>
</head>
<body>
<a href="#skip" class="visually-hidden">Skip to main content</a>
<header>
<a href="/" class="home-link">kfitz</a>
<nav>
<h2 class="visually-hidden" id="top-level-navigation-menu">Top level navigation menu</h2>
<ul class="nav">
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/">Home</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/blog/">Archive</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/about/">About</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/projects/">Projects</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/presentations/">Presentations</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/teaching/">Teaching</a></li>
<li class="nav-item"><a href="/feed/feed.xml">Feed</a></li>
</ul>
</nav>
</header>
<link href="/pagefind/pagefind-ui.css" rel="stylesheet">
<script src="/pagefind/pagefind-ui.js"></script>
<div id="search"></div>
<script>
window.addEventListener('DOMContentLoaded', (event) => {
new PagefindUI({ element: "#search", showSubResults: true });
});
</script>
<main id="skip">
<heading-anchors>
<h1 id="reverb10-day-14-appreciate">#reverb10, day 14: Appreciate</h1>
<ul class="post-metadata">
<li><time datetime="2010-12-15">15 December 2010</time></li>
<li><a href="/tags/reverb10/" class="post-tag">#reverb10</a>, </li>
<li><a href="/tags/reflecting/" class="post-tag">reflecting</a></li>
</ul>
<p>Yesterdays prompt:</p>
<blockquote>
<p>Appreciate. Whats the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?</p>
</blockquote>
<p>My initial response to this prompt, like several of the preceding ones, was a bit of eye-rolling. Must everything be about such utterly wholesome, new-agey feelings?</p>
<p>My resistance to thinking about this is worth thinking about, though. What is it about terms like “appreciation” and “gratitude” that make me want to cringe? Is there a kind of shame involved in letting my ordinarily — what are the adjectives Im looking for here? tough? cool? <em>intellectual</em>? — self be seen expressing this kind of heartfelt emotion?</p>
<p>There have been times when Ive written here about that kind of deeply felt personal stuff, and Ive more often than not wound up feeling over-exposed by it. Yes, this has at moments been a quite personal blog, but the persona Ive maintained here is largely professional, and so getting into the gooshy muck of that other part of my life just seems inappropriate somehow.</p>
<p>But this prompt is important, I think, and warrants letting that shield down a bit. I remember quite clearly several years ago, in the thick of a pretty unpleasant Christmas, when certain of my family members were driving me up a tree, sitting at Mass praying that Id find some sense of gratitude in amongst the aggravation. And it helped, quite amazingly in fact, getting me to focus less on what was annoying me and more on the gifts — the metaphorical gifts — Id been given.</p>
<p>Since then, Ive tried to keep that sense of gratitude as close to the front of my thoughts as I can. And in the last year, what Id say Ive come to appreciate most of all, and to feel deeply grateful for, is the extraordinary good luck that Ive had in my life, and particularly in my career. Yes, Ive worked hard, but I honestly dont feel like the opportunities Ive been given are anything I deserve. “Deserve” is an awfully funny concept in an industry in which one spends ten years and tens of thousands of dollars training for a position, only to have a 25% chance of actually getting that position — and a radically lower chance of getting a position as amazing as the one that I lucked into.</p>
<p>The year I went on the market, I applied for 60+ jobs, out of which I got two MLA interviews, one fly-back, and this fantastic job. Yes, I did all the things I was supposed to do: I prepared, was engaged, gave a good talk and taught two good classes. But so much of the process was driven by luck — that the job that perfectly described my work happened to be available the year I was on the market, for starters, plus a few other odd coincidences along the way — that I cannot feel as though I “deserved” the job, any more than I would suggest that the other applicants <em>didnt</em> deserve it.</p>
<p>And this is true across several aspects of my career, in which Ive happened to find myself in the right place at the right time, saying something that someone wanted to hear. Ive worked hard, and Ive had some good things to say, but Ive also been lucky. Ive been given some extraordinary opportunities. And Ive been supported, by amazing colleagues and collaborators.</p>
<p>And for all that, I am truly, unashamedly, grateful.</p>
<ul class="links-nextprev"><li class="links-nextprev-prev">← Previous<br> <a href="/reverb10-day-13-action/">#reverb10, day 13: Action</a></li><li class="links-nextprev-next">Next →<br><a href="/reverb10-day-15-5-minutes/">#reverb10, day 15: 5 Minutes</a></li>
</ul>
<hyvor-talk-comments website-id="9100" page-id="/reverb10-day-14-appreciate/"></hyvor-talk-comments>
<div class="webmentions" id="webmentions">
<h3 id="webmentions-2">Webmentions</h3>
<p>No replies yet.</p>
</div>
</heading-anchors>
</main>
<footer>
<p><em>Built with <a href="https://www.11ty.dev/">Eleventy v3.1.0</a>. All content <a href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/deed.en">CC BY 4.0</a> if you're human.</em></p><p></p>
</footer>
<script type="module" src="/dist/rJ3_G-2ArF.js"></script>
</body>
</html>